The Yellow Umbrella.

I’ve always been a believer in soul mates and fairytales and unicorns and rainbows. Ever since I was little, the idea of a princess with one parent that’s been waiting her whole life for a man to complete compliment her has been in my head. As you get older, believing in soul mates is kind of like believing in Santa or the Tooth Fairy. It’s nonsense. Nowadays, soul mates has become, for the most part, a thing of the past. Instant gratification is key. That’s one idea of some non-religious folk. As a 23 year old Catholic youth minister, I’ve seen and heard some of the most beautiful and nauseating love stories. If you’re Catholic, you may have heard of Jackie (Francois) Angel’s story. If not, google immediately. Every conference I attend, one of the speakers talks of their spouse and how wonderful they are. They speak of stories such as proposing to them in front of the Blessed Sacrament or praying the rosary together before their wedding. With the exception of these people, I have never heard of anyone else in this world doing this stuff. I would kill for stories like this to be true for me. But it just seems like Snow White waiting for her prince to come someday or Cinderella catching the eye of Prince Charming. They are modern day fairytales that are simply that, fantasy. Everyday I look at my news feeds, I see classmates and friends finding their “Bobby Angel” or having a baby. I can’t help feeling left behind as if I’m one of the girls in the village that the prince comes to with a glass slipper and it’s a size 8 (i’m a 6.5). After all the princes and their glassware have come through, I’m stuck waiting by the fire. 

One kind of modern day fairytale that was on television is How I Met Your Mother. This show has become one of my all time favorites. It caries so many lessons and pieces of advice for people in their 20s or 30s. It has a lot of symbols. One being a yellow umbrella. The mother is the one with the yellow umbrella, the one that Ted has been searching for all these years. The phrase I associate with it is, “The right place and the right time.” Ted goes through a long journey to find this woman he’s meant to be with. There are times when he wants to give up completely. His ex Stella puts it best when she says:

“I know that you’re tired of waiting. And you might have to wait a little while more but, she’s on her way, Ted. And she’s getting here as fast as she can.”

There are times when I want to give up, when it feels like everyone is paired off and I’m going to die a lonely cat lady. The yellow umbrella has been that symbol of hope that there is a person out there for me. I may be a complete idiot for believing this but I don’t care. I like to think that fairytales do exist and that there is a Bobby Angel out there for me. It may take me some time to find him but when it’s the right time and the right place, all this bullshit won’t matter. 

With all of that said, a yellow umbrella will be my first tattoo. And hopefully if I do meet my yellow umbrella, he’ll have a blue french horn.

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Confessions of a Third Wheel.

If there’s one thing I hate in this world, it’s bring the third wheel. I’m 23 now and this has been a common occurrence unfortunately. There’s nothing worse than sitting in a movie theater with best friend that is hanging all over/dating the guy you’re not so secretly in love with. The sad part is that this situation and others like this can be avoided.

If you are in a relationship and you have a friend that isn’t, please do not invite them out with you and your significant other. This could lead to a future drinking problem and an overall unpleasant time for your friend. The pity invite is the worst. One Valentine’s Day, my then BFF & her boyfriend came to my house with a bag of chocolate and kidnapped me out of pity. I sat on a couch at her house watching a romantic comedy and stuffing my face with Dove chocolate. I ended up texting a friend to rescue me. To them, this might’ve been a good deed. In reality, it was the equivalent of waterboarding. Maybe you’re reading this and thinking, “IT IS LIKE WATERBOARDING!!!” My friend, you’re not alone.

It always seems to be the BFFs that get a boyfriend then the balance of the group of friends change. That’s pretty much the situation I’m in now. Some good has come of this perpetual awkwardness. Here’s my advice to you tricycles:

1. Find a buffer

Tricycles are so awkward. Make it a quad! Bring in a friend that can bring balance to the force. If the couple starts to get all couple-y, focus on your other friend. You also have someone incase you need to use an emergency exit, meaning you can ditch the couple and grab drinks with your other friend!

2. Say NO

It’s a magical word that is a big part of my life. If a couple invites just you out to dinner, drinks or whatever, say no. No one is forcing you to put up with this shit.

3. Don’t get sad, be awesome instead

If I’ve learned anything from HIMYM, it’s when you get sad, stop being sad and be awesome instead. You find you give less shits when you just focus on being awesome.

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